Friday, November 05, 2004

UFOs, the Russians, and the Republicans

A lot of you called or emailed and said "hey Bill I know you said it was the Dem.s who are in with the aliens but isn't it true that more alien activity was recorded i nthe Republican-controlled 50s than any other time"? Well yes it is true and I guess I should've gone into more detail, but we can do that now.

UFO sightings occured more in the 50s and were more frequent as the decade went on-why would this be if the aliens had a base here (AREA 51)? Well the aliens had yet to develop low-speed low-altitude crafts (by which I mean PLANES and or HOVERCRAFT) and so had to rely on obtrusive technology--eg FLYING SAUCERS to conduct abductions and experiments. Adlai Stevenson the 1952 Dem. candidate for president was prepared to broker a deal in which the aliens would be allowed to buy and refurbish two dozen aircraft from WW2 but of course he lost and at first Eiseenhower was loath to deal with the aliens and thus the sightings stepped up in frequency.

Then in 1960 the U2 spy plane was downed over Russia and the pilot was held prisoner. Well this was no ordinary pilot (remember: Eisenhower and Nixon were BOTH MASONS you think anyone flying over Russian in a SECRET PLANE is just some joe schmoe pilot? HA!)) The pilot was Henry Appleby a powerful 32nd-level mason who was attempting to retrieve the fingerbone of Rasputin as per orders of the Masonic Temple. Now that he was downed Eisenhower and the Masons were, as they say, in deep shit. So he had no choice but to go to the aliens and agree that in exchange for beaming down Francis Gary Powers as a stooge so to speak and returning the mason safely (alas without the relic) the gov't would give the aliens six U2 aircraft and contine to look the other way as far as abductions and experiments.

So there you have it. Not everythings as cut and dried as the CNN/Fox news suburbanite shows would have you believe. You have to peel away the layers just like an onion and just like an onion the more you peel away the more it starts to stink.

I'm Bill Gaston, and I hope I enlightened you just a little bit.

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